Yes, I had a lovely trip..

..to Estonia and Finland. Here is some pictures:

Me on the ferry from Tallinn to Helsinki. Feeling safe around the Danish lifeboat.

Me on stage in Tartu. 300-350 people were in, it was a brilliant first night on this small tour.

Danish in Finland is double the size it is in Denmark. This can't be right!

All in all a fine adventure of comedy. One of the great things for me was the possibility to do 25 minutes in front of big audiences for a 3-day run. It's been a while as the locals say.

Back in London my first gig was in front of 6 people, who were all going on stage themselves. The perfect contrast to the glory of Estonia and Finland, and the perfect reminder to me of why I like the London circuit.

Of course it is great fun to do shows to 100+ audiences, it's a kick, it's one of the best sides of this drug called stand-up comedy. But what makes those shows good, really good is when the performer really wants to perform. There's no way to be sure of this, until you see that person in a room with only 5 other acts saying: "Let's just workshop it!"

I really admire the big amount of people on the London circuit, who are so eager to perform. It's very inspiring and they lift the rest of us up another level. Some of my best nights here, have been in front of less than 10 people. You really have to work for your kicks, but when they hit, it feels so much better.

The morale in this blog is, if you find a drug that suits you, you should experiment!

Wolves..

..arriving in Denmark is making me wanna move back.

It's not the job that stresses you..

..It's the time off. I've learned this from starting my new job. I work in an office and whenever I'm there, I'm relaxed.

The reason for this is that the job is now the clearest authority figure in my world. Whenever I'm there, I'm satisfying my master. I'm doing my duty as a citizen. No one can touch me, as long as I'm filling in a position somewhere. Everyone needs me to do this 40 hours a week.

So I do it. With pleasure. It gives me a security.

But when I'm off, when I have to leave the office, the stress kicks in. All I can think about is that I need to go back. I need to get all my relaxing done before the next morning. So I rush home. I'm pushing people I don't even know on the tube and the bus. "I've payed my dues people! Get out of my way!"

I'm in such a hurry to get home to relax. I rarely realize, how much I could relax on the time I'm travelling. Sometimes I look at streets I pass and think: "I've never been down that street, maybe I should. It looks nice. After all I see it everyday." Only to rush by it the very next morning.

It would probably be terrible to go down that street. I might meet some of the people, I kick on the tube. They might interrupt my relaxation. Maybe I would have to go back and let them interrupt even more. It's probably best to stay on the bus. At least there's a seat for me here.

I feel so stressed on my days off, because I know that I need to go back to my master. He's the only one, who really needs me. He's the man in my life. My man. The MAN. There's no time for other people in my life.

I feel bad when I let my master down. I hate it, when I come in late, and it's not my fault. This happened once, when another person from the working force had stepped out on the rails. One life was ended and everyone else had their life paused for 25 minutes, until we again could continue our journey towards our positions.

Everyone was more stressed. There was more pushing, than I've experienced before. Everyone was very annoyed with the delay and having to let their master down.

But here on my day off, I think I might have a solution to this problem. If we take it that at least 1000 persons was delayed by this incident, the math looks like this:

1 (life) = 1000 (persons) x 25 (minutes delayed) = 25000 (total minutes delayed)

This might not be interesting on it's own, but try to compare it to this:

1000 (persons) x 5 (minutes talking to a stranger)

= 5000 (minutes spend on getting to know another member of the working force) = 0 (life)

As it occur here, we could save 20000 minutes and 1 life altogether. Of course this is only a theory. It hasn't been tested, but I'll try to do it. In between relaxing.

It's been a while..

But now I think my blog has finished mourning the loss of Amy. I have moved on myself, too.

I've been living in London since around August. Here I'm trying to establish myself with more loose ends than ever. They way I've lived so far, I should have seen it coming.


I'm not unsatisfied with this either. I have a job and I carry a smile around most days. I mainly came down here to do this:

I've also started an open mic night with my friend Scott Merrington. It's called Danish Bacon Comedy. We didn't choose the name, but I like it. Danish and bacon is one of my favourite food-combos.

You should come by one day.

I never bought an Amy Winehouse album.

She would just use the money on drugs and alcohol. This is the same reason, that homeless people die everyday. But if someone has a talent, we will gladly support their addictions.

The comedian Pete Johansson (http://www.petejohansson.com) wrote this on his twitter today:
"@escarius: We watched a car slowly crash for 5 years, and resigned ourselves we couldn't stop it. The tragedy of Amy's death is what it says about us."

I think he is right, Amys death wasn't unpredictable. We saw it coming, but noone really did anything, but encouraging her lifestyle. People should be able to choose the life they want, but if someone has a problem and anyone notices it, please help each other. And if you meet a homeless person, who needs money for something, trust that he/she will find the money more useful than yourself.

May everyone living help and love each other, and may everyone dead rest in peace.

Horoscopes are mostly for the stars.

I am starting to have a great interest in horoscopes. I do not find astronomy interesting at all, but horoscopes are great. Therefore, as a service to you, I will now do todays horoscopes for the zodiac signs Taurus, Gemini and Cancer.

Taurus:
Today you will read your horoscope. It will be written in the font "times new roman". After you have read your horoscope, you will still not know, what is going to happen with your day.


Gemini:
You will, at some point today, think of a special person in your life. It could be after reading a horoscope, and most likely, it is not relevant to you or to that special person in your life, but you really want to believe in horoscopes.

Cancer:
Shit happens...

Going on a date. (A list of things to remember.)

I rarely date. It is just not my thing. My thing is sitting at home, not being on a date.

But if you should decide to go on a date, here are some things to remember:

1. Only date living creatures of your own species. (It's not socially acceptable to date a dead dog.)

2. Before going out, you should always make sure, that your sexual orientations fit.  (If you are a heterosexual male, you should date a heterosexual female.)

3. Be sure to understand the importance of number 2 on this list. Please allow me to explain it. Maybe this equation will help:

X (A heterosexual female) + Y (A heterosexual male) = Ø (A perfect sexual match)

This would work, but now try and compare the first equation with this:

Z (A bisexual female) + D (A homosexual female) = T (A perfect sexual movie)

This would work as well. Now pay attention, because the last one is a bit more complicated:

Y (A heterosexual male) + U (A homosexual male) = P (Two dissapointed males)

This last equation does not include factors like level of alcohol and if Y is in the mood for experimenting. If these factors are just right the equation would look like this:

Y (A drunk heterosexual male) + U (A slightly less drunk homosexual male) = Oh (A massive hangover + A massive erection)


4. Remember to have ice cream in the fridge, for when you get home. (Let's face it. Most dates will go wrong. Why? Because people going on dates, often are people who likes dating. If the date should go well and turn in to a relationship, you are no longer allowed to date.)

You are now ready to go on a date with another person. Enjoy!

If you have any questions regarding the equations or anything else, please do not hesitate to ask me.